"Ode to a Clean Floor" Lodging Quality Assurance

  • Newsroom
  • >
  • “Ode to a Clean Floor” Lodging Quality Assurance

Once upon a time…..I went to Vail to ski,

I instantly adored the place, and knew it was for me!

Home I went – but not for long – and barely had unpacked,

When I took the plunge and bought a place, so I always could go back.

My new ski place was really grand, and the mountains are a treat!

But it’s quite the understatement to say that Vail is cheap!


And I knew then what I must do: to make a weighty dent

In the mortgage and expenses, it would be wise to rent.

I opened up my condo to renters far and near

And raked in rental income for six or seven years.

But something else was happening…(and here was my mistake)

With all the people traipsing through, my place did not look great.

Ski boots, poles, off-season mud, and partiers galore

Enjoyed my little condo, but wreaked havoc on my floor!

I didn’t really think to mind – it’s flooringafter all-

Not nearly quite as noticed as the furniture or walls.

That’s what I thought– but hadn’t been to see it in a while

And did not fully understand the impact to the tile.


I kept it clean, made small repairs, and upgraded the doors,

But never had professionals routinely clean the floors.

Sure, I had them swept and mopped,

And got that “just cleaned” feeling,

But over time, the grout and tile needs a good, deep clean and sealing.

As I ignored this crucial task, the years of grit and stains

Accumulated on the floors that I had not maintained.

In hindsight now I realize the advice I should have heeded,

When the LQA inspectors tried to tell me what was needed!

The consequence I suffered, you may have figured out?

If not…. I will proceed with what this story’s all about:


One day I took time off again to travel back to Vail,

And skiing just ahead of me while on my favorite trail,

The most amazing gal I’d ever seen in my whole life,

And when I got to know her, knew one day she’d be my wife.

We skied together, had some drinks, took in a show or two,

And time we spent and fun we had confirmed what my heart knew:

That I had found my person, my other half, my bride,

And from then on she’d be with me, forever by my side.

And soon enough I asked her to come over to my home

And plan our lives to be together, and never be alone.


She arrived in early evening, and knocked upon the door,

I opened it; she stepped upon the entry tile floor.

In that one moment, all would change, as did her gorgeous smile

Which faded as her eyes dropped down and landed on my tile.

I saw her take it in, and noticed as she shuddered,

And when she finally spoke, it was an angry stutter:

“Ugh! This is how you treat your place?!  That’s awful! Don’t you know

That I cannot abide these floors?  I’m sorry I must go.”

With a wistful look she turned around, and left right there and then,

Since that bleak day, I never saw or heard from her again.


So, to all you condo owners: this melancholy tale

Is a lesson for you all to learn from me where I have failed.

My soulmate’s gone, and I feel like my heart has been ripped out,

So the moral is: For goodness sakes! Clean your tile and your grout!


Learn more about Vail Valley Partnership’s Lodging Quality Assurance.